Back at it…


Sam here, after a long long hiatus. Turns out my WordPress URL is still active, so I may as well use it!

The truth is…

I have had a real identity crisis over the past year or two. I’m at a place where I feel some trust again in what I think, and what I read, and how I write. I feel ready to share some of myself here again in this space.

I don’t plan to go full force into #BookstagramLyf3 ever again. Of course as I say that, my new instagram is covered in nothing but book posts.

Oops all books…

So where have I been?!??

Tulsa, Oklahoma of all places. My partner, Tim, and I were both accepted into the Tulsa Remote program, and we’ve spent a little over a year renting a place with our dog & 2 cats.

Before lockdown started, I had 0 cats! Becoming a cat mom has been nothing short of magical. I am obsessed with both of them, and I can’t wait to see how they grow and change throughout their lives. I was also living in San Diego. I moved twice during the pandemic so far, and I am in the midst of planning a 3rd move. The air is rich with white supremacy in Tulsa, and it’s not something I feel safe living around, not if I have the choice!

For the last year, educating myself about the ever-presence of that bigoted and racist ideology has been my major focus. That, and trauma therapy. I found an amazing therapist in Tulsa, her name is Danielle Miner.

She’s so adorable too! 🙂

She has taught me so much about poly-vagal therapy and really helped me to like myself again…a little. After everything that has happened in the last few years, I think everyone could stand to learn about the “Soul Nerve”, as it’s affectionately known.

In all of the works on antiracism that I have read, there is a huge importance placed on building community and learning alongside others. I want to do that, but I am also still terrified of being around other humans. I hope I can find a bigger community to learn with here.

So what now?

I’m still reading a ton! But my tastes have changed completely. I mostly read non-fiction, with a focus on queer and Black liberation. I am reading with The Everyday Racism book club and the Become a Good Ancestor book club. I would highly recommend checking them both out if you are struggling (as I was) to trust yourself to find the books you need.

Doing this work, sorry The Work™️, has completely changed my perspective. Am I the perfect antiracist ally? Absolutely not, I am only just getting started. However, I do think I can trust myself to provide insight for other white-bodied people who are looking for a community to learn with, or anyone who resonates with my words. I don’t presume to have anything meaningful to say about the lived experiences of People of the Global Majority, but I welcome anyone to this space with open arms.

I welcome your questions to this space. I welcome your curiosity to this space. I welcome your confusion, and anger, and fear to this space. I will do my best to honor these feelings in you and in myself as I continue to grow and gain a better understanding of the world.

Book Recommendations:

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